A Reflection for those who take John 10:10 seriously!

Mary Ryan RSJ

Once upon a time a man found an eagle’s egg, and placed it under a brooding hen. The eaglet hatched with the brood of chickens, and grew up to be just like them. It scratched the earth for worms and insects. It clucked and cackled, and, just like the chickens, it could thrash its wings and fly a little way into the air.

Years passed, and the eagle grew very old. One day, it saw a magnificent bird fly far above it in the cloudless sky. It floated with graceful majesty amongst the powerful wind currents, with scarcely a movement of its strong golden wings. Spellbound, the old eagle asked its neighbour: "What is that?" "Oh, that’s the eagle, the king of the birds’; was the response, "but don’t give it another thought. You and I are different from him. He belongs to the sky. We belong to the earth. We’re chickens!"

So, the backyard eagle-chicken-grown-old never gave it another thought. It lived and died a chicken — for that’s what it believed it was!

Have you ever met a "back-yard eagle-chicken"? Sadly, I have met plenty of them! People who don’t seem to belong where they are, who are continually discontented with their lot in life who can’t commit themselves to any project with energy or enthusiasm. Misfits, whom we could call "round pegs in square holes". Some of them, like the "back-yard eagle-chicken" go through life completely unaware of the root of their problem. Others are very aware, and will, perhaps, spend the rest of their lives regretting the poor, uninformed choices they made earlier in life. Over the years, I have met quite a number of such people who have said to me, generally with a deep sigh, "If only I had my time over again’, or words to that effect. How sad: to reach the age of 50, 60 or even 70, and to feel that you don’t belong where you are, that life has passed you by, that, in many instances, it’s too late to make any big changes in your life’s circumstances. "I still haven’t found what I’m looking for", that well-known U2 song, could well be their theme song!

I believe that there will always be "back-yard eagle-chickens" in our midst while there are generations of young people who grow up, largely unaware of the range of vocational choices from which they can choose, and who, consequently, do not consider all the possibilities before embarking upon a path that may not be the best option for them, given their personality, talents, skills and life experiences.

In late 1992, during the last week of the school year, I invited my two Year 12 RE classes to project 20 years into their future. They were asked to imagine themselves in 2012, and write about: where they might be ... what they might be doing ... what they would believe ... and what would be important to them. The writing was completed in class time, without any prior time to think about these questions, and I assured them that what they had written would be treated confidentially. As I read their words, I discovered that there was a definite, consistent pattern: all of them believed that, twenty years hence, at age 37 or 38, they would be married and parenting families. This made me wonder whether my students were typical of their peers or whether this was an exceptional group. I spoke about this with the other Year 12 RE teachers, and, curious as to whether their respective classes shared similar aspirations, they too repeated the process with their students. Can you guess what the outcome was? All except one of our 150 or so Year 12’s, believed that, in 2012, they would be married and raising children! Was our co-ed class of ‘92 on the outskirts of Melbourne truly representative of their contemporaries, and subsequent generations of 17 and 18 year olds? I would like to think not, and I admit that I have no access to validated sociological data on this matter.² However, my dealings with many other groups of Year 12 students since then, together with my ministry with young adults over many years have convinced me that the majority of secondary students leave school with one-track minds: they believe that they must marry someone, someday, and they are unaware that there are multiple vocational choices. Their questions then, are around who and when they will marry, rather than around what, I believe, should be their fundamental question: "Should I be married ?"

Marriage can, and should be, a life-giving choice for those who have particular personalities and gifts, BUT there are other choices, other vocations, which could be really life-giving for particular people! No decision can be a truly informed one unless all the possible options are explored, and, sadly, many of our young people are just not aware of the vocational choices available to them. Let me stress that I am not anti-marriage! But I am anti the prevailing pattern of young adults automatically drifting into partnering, then marriage, and I am anti the attitude that is so pervasive in our society, amongst both the young and not-so-young, that marriage is the only vocational path, that it is "a must’ for everybody, that those who are not married cannot be fulfilled adults, and that there are just no other viable or life-giving alternatives!! There are!

Let me pose a hypothetical question: Supposing you have made a decision to spend a lot of money in the near future: on some land ... a computer ... overseas travel … a car ... a sound system. Would you race straight out and buy the first thing you see? Not likely! Money, for most of us, is a scarce, hard-earned commodity, and a big outlay is generally preceded by a lot of homework on our part: We read up on our topic, we talk to those who are in the know, and we shop around for the best price. Now, if we would go to this trouble for mere material things [important though they may be!], are we also willing to do some ‘homework’ about our life and future? What value do we place upon our lives and our future happiness? Uninformed ‘impulse spending’ generally leads to regret or dissatisfaction. By the same token, an uninformed vocational decision is, inevitably, a recipe for unhappiness and disillusionment, and perhaps remaining forever as a "back-yard eagle-chicken". How can we empower our young people to do their ‘homework’, to give their future life—their vocation—the serious consideration it deserves?

Every person is born with a package of potential — gifts and talents that are given by God, for themselves and for others. If these are, firstly, discovered, and then, progressively nurtured and developed, we will be on the right track to developing a healthy self-esteem, and to reaching our fullest potential. We will also have the capacity to contribute as fully as possible to the life of our family and any group to which we might belong ... to really make a difference in our part of the world.

Through our Baptism as Christians, every single one of us has a vocation". The word vocation comes from the Latin verb vocare, which means ‘to call". By our Baptism, we are called—invited by God—to become disciples of Jesus. Our vocation is to discover, develop and share our gifts and resources with others, as we work together to make a difference in our local and global communities. Implicit in this call is freedom. An invitation always leaves a person free to say "yes" or "no", and there should be no pressure, coercion or manipulation. We have the freedom to accept, or reject, God’s invitation. As I understand it, each person’s vocation actually has two distinct components:

Who God wants us to be and become (i.e. spirituality)

What God calls us to do —for God and for others (i.e. ministry)

This call from God is not to a job, nor is it to a one-off event, such as a wedding or other celebration. Rather it is a call to a life-long process — that of becoming fully alive! Our Christian vocation is thus a call to a life commitment: to love, to grow into the best self you can be, and into union with God. We are our vocation!

So, God, who called us at the time of our Baptism, continues to call us throughout our lives, and that on-going call is always an invitation to "choose life" (Deuteronomy 30:13) — in whatever circumstances we find ourselves. How do we do that? I believe that we will find life—in abundance—and thereby realise God’s dream that we become our ‘best self’, if we find, and consciously choose, the vocational calling/path that is the best fit for each individual, given our personality, story, talents, etc. If we want to be happy, well-adjusted, productive, fulfilled adults, it is crucial that each one of us takes time to seriously consider all of the lifestyle options, and then to carefully choose our vocational path. Drifting is just not good enough ... we must be pro-active! We must do the ‘homework’! There is need to explore, and take to prayer, questions like:

What are my gifts and talents?

Do I have the particular gifts and talents and capacity for the commitment required to make a marriage really life-giving for both partners?

Could the single vocation be the most life-giving option for me, and enable me to most fully develop my particular gifts and qualities?

Could my gifts and talents be most effectively developed and utilised through a religious vocation? .. .What about becoming a priest or religious sister or brother?

Obviously, this calls for an investment of time that allows for some serious soul-searching: This ‘homework’ should involve reading, reflection, discussion with others whose opinions we value, and, most of all, prayer for guidance and inspiration. This process of discernment should enable us to discover the vocational path that will help us to develop to our fullest potential, and thereby become most fully able to share the Good News of Jesus with others, wherever our vocation may lead us. If we neglect to do this, we do so at our own peril! Our life is a gift that is meant to be treasured and generously shared, not squandered! We can choose to fly like the eagle, or remain a long-term "backyard eagle-chicken"!!

Your vocation - every person’s vocation - is a call to fulfil Jesus’ dream for you ... "I have come that you may have life, and have it to the full."

Where might Jesus’ dream be calling you?

Which vocation would enable you to grow as a person? To love most naturally and completely. To develop and use your gifts fully? . . .To reach your fullest potential?

Which one of the vocational options appeals to you most at this moment?

Are you open to considering the one that might least appeal at this time?

Which of the vocational options will enable you to fly like an eagle, deeply knowing that you could never settle for being a "back-yard eagle-chicken"?

Which of the vocational lifestyles will bring you real peace and happiness, and fullness of life? That will depend on your gifts and personality! We know for sure that God calls many, in fact, the majority of people to "choose life" within the vocation of marriage. Others are called to "choose life" through the single vocation, while others [a relative few] are called to "choose life" as sisters, brothers and priests. In God’s eyes, all of these vocations are equal, since, contrary to what many people [sadly] believe, "God has no favourites"! (Acts 10:34) God just wants us to experience fullness of life — for our own sakes, and for the sake of those whose lives will touch ours. Life generates life, and if we are fully alive we will be life-givers for others, not takers!

Options can only be options if we are aware of them — and consider them. When all of the vocational possibilities are taken seriously, one is empowered to make an informed decision that should, ultimately, be a life-giving decision! Hopefully you will be able to respond to the call which is right for you. Our world needs the gift of people who have a strong sense of being called, who are fulfilled in their vocation, and who exude that peace and contentment that comes from knowing, deep down that they are "round pegs in round holes"!